a peace of mind...

my baby is finally out. after 3 excruciating days, i can finally hear his beautiful voice again. im glad that he is home now. i knew it. those stupid corrupted cops would beat him up. damn you malaysian police!

 they are corrupted and most of them just want money under the table. screw you assholes. 

im glad my baby is out. i miss him so much. cant wait to see him. i wanted to be the first to see him after his family but i know that my wish wouldnt come true. they never do. he's gona go see his friends and they'll get to see how he is before i do. when he was inside, i was the one cracking my head thinking abouut him while they were living their lives peacefully. im never appreciated. i should be able to see that by now right? ive done so many things for people. yet, i get nothing in return. people dont even notice that i exist. im kinda mad  by the fact that nobody came and helped me. i mean, my bf is like your best friend right? yeah right. doenst matter that much though. what bothers me is that the fact that the one i love himself is not affected by this. i thought that he would be taken aback by the fact that none of his friends came for me even after i asked for help. obviously i didnt know the way back and all right? thank God for agil. he's not even a friend! i barely know him. a complete stranger helped me. what if he did something bad to me? who would find out? nobody thought about that right? everything is cool cuz i got home safely. what if it was the other way round? what if i went missing after that? so many things clustered in my head. im confused. but one thing i know for sure is that im madly in love with putai. 

sayang, do you know that you drive me mad almost all the time. i love you for that. do you know that you make me work my ass of till im awfully tired to even think? i love you for that too. you've changed alot. for the better and for the worse. my love for you just grew deeper. its a one way thing somehow. hehe. you are the only one who could understand me and notice all the little things that i do. you're the only one who managed to break into my walls. and now you're kinda trapped inside these walls with me. like i always say baby, you're stuck with me...forever... (cant wait to watch OBSESSED with you) hehehe.. 

CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR WONDERFUL RESULTS SAYANG!! IM SO PROUD OF YOU!!

p/s: I LOVE YOU